The Last Goodbye
by WickedTheMusicalLove
Summary: This is a oneshot on Matthew Morgan's funeral at Langley. Minor GG5 spoilers. 100% guarantee that the story is better than the summary because the summary is only a summary. The story is very realistic!


My name is Cameron Ann Morgan. I know you know the rest of the details, so I'll leave those out. It will be safer for both of us. A few months ago, I found out that my father was dead. I know he's been missing for five years, but I still had hope that he was alive. It was unbearable to watch as my aunt clawed through the snow, revealing my father's body. I bawled in Zach's arms as Abby dug inches deeper into the frozen ground.

Today is the day of my father's funeral at Langley. They are holding his remains there until the plot in Nebraska is ready. I looked down at my dress and sighed. Everything was too familiar. The black dresses, the depressed moods, and the sympathetic looks weren't new at all. Bex and Macey were across from me, pinning Liz's dress into place. There wasn't anything small enough to fit her in the store.

"You okay, Cam?" Bex asked when she saw me.

"Yeah," I said. And come to think about it, I didn't feel horrible. I felt relief. Relief. That's not a word spies get to use very often, so it felt good to say it. I know now that my father isn't suffering. Of course I wish he was still here with my mother and me, but it's good to know that he's not in any pain.

"It's time to go, Cam," Liz said thirty seconds later.

"Okay," I sighed, following my roommates out of our dorm and into the foyer.

"Are you all ready to go?" my mother asked sadly when she joined us.

"Yes," we all said in unison. Shortly after, we followed my mom into the limo.

The car ride to Langley was everything I had expected it to be. Bex, Macey, and Liz sat quietly on both sides of me. My mother dazed out the window, looking nothing like the spy I had grown up with. She looked like a woman who would never be happy again. Looking at her made me want to cry, which made me want to comfort her, which made me nervous about the funeral. Mom and I had gone to a funeral for my father years ago, but his body wasn't there. I didn't want to think about what it would be like now that his body actually was here. Needless to say, I spent my car ride thinking about the aforementioned topic.

After arriving at Langley, we all piled out of the limo and went inside. After going through numerous security measures, the five of us were escorted into the room where the ceremony was to be held.

"Mom, is Aunt Abby coming?" I asked.

"Yes sweetie; she should be here in a couple of minutes, along with the Baxters,"

"My parents are going to be here?" Bex asked as soon as she heard her parents being answered.

"Yes. They didn't tell you?" my mother questioned.

"No," Bex said, and anxiously started scanning the door for her parents. It was winter break, but my roommates decided to stay at Gallagher a week longer than usual so that they would be there for me at the funeral.

"Well, I guess I'll go sit down now," I said and walked up to a row of chairs that had been neatly placed in the front center. Liz and Macey followed me, but Bex and my mom stayed because the Baxters had just arrived. Three minutes after the Baxter's arrival, everyone else was situated in their seats, waiting for the ceremony to begin. My mother, Aunt Abby, Bex, Macey, Liz, Bex's parents, and me all sat in the same row.

"Ladies and gentlemen, we are gathered here today to celebrate the life of Matthew Andrew Morgan. He was a beloved son, father, husband, and friend," said a man who was standing in the front of the room. "Matthew was a caring and loyal man. He was a great CIA agent and always cared for his friends and family."

The man carried on with his speech, but I only half listened as he went on about how my father was such a great man. It seemed so strange to hear a man I'd never seen before say such things about my father. I looked over at my mother and saw that she was crying. I wasn't surprised; she had the right to cry. This was her chance to let her guard down, even though I could tell she was trying not to. I reached over and grabbed her hand, silently telling her that I was here with her, that she wasn't alone.

"And now I would like to give you all a chance to say your final goodbyes to Matthew Morgan. His burial ceremony will take place in a couple of weeks," the man in the front of the room said. He wrapped up his speech and let us all take turns saying our final goodbyes.

"Cammie, before you go up there, I want to tell you something." I turned around and saw my mother standing there, with tears in her eyes. I had managed to keep myself from crying, but looking at my mother made my eyes water. And before I knew it, I was crying too. She looked so helpless, and I felt helpless.

"Okay," I said, wiping away a tear.

My mother handed me a tissue and said, "Cammie, I am so proud of you, and I want you to know that. I know I've said this to you many times before, but I really want you to listen. I'm so proud of what you've become. I know this may not be the best place to say that, but I wanted to say it here. While your father is here. Even if he's only here in spirit, I feel it's best to say it here. And I know he would be so proud of you too," she choked on the last words.

"Thank you Mom," I said, crying harder and wrapping her in a tight hug.

When we stopped hugging, Aunt Abby came over and put her arm around Mom's shoulders. Bex, Liz, and Macey all came over and gave me a hug.

"Cam, do you want to go up there now?" Abby asked. I shook my head. I didn't want to say my last goodbye to my father yet. I didn't want to ever go up to the closed casket in the front of the room.

"Okay, well you can come up when you're ready," she told me, and walked over to the casket with my mother.

"Cam, it's going to be okay," Liz said. "Everything is going to be okay." She sat down next to me, followed by Bex and Liz.

"I-I don't w-want to go up th-there," I said through sobs.

"It's okay Cam, you can take your time," Bex said, handing me some more tissues.

"Thanks," I sniffled.

"No problem," she said. We all sat in silence for the next ten minutes. I looked around me. The room was full of people. I didn't know most of them, but it still felt good to somehow know that I wasn't the only one mourning my dad's death. I looked over at my mom and Aunt Abby. Mom was still bawling, and Aunt Abby had started to cry too. Behind them were Mr. and Mrs. Baxter. Mrs. Baxter was crying, and her husband was comforting her. Bex stood up and went to stand by them.

After sitting in silence for another five minutes, I turned to Macey and Liz and said, "I'm going to go up now."

"Do you want us to come with you, or do you want to go alone?" Macey asked.

"Alone," I said. I wanted to say goodbye by myself. For once in my life, I didn't have a reason. I just wanted it that way, and that satisfied me.

When I got up to the coffin, I stared at it for a moment. I couldn't get past the fact that my father's body was on the other side of the lid. It hurt me to think about what I was about to say, but it had to be done sometime. I knew I would regret it for the rest of my life if I didn't.

"I'm sorry Daddy," I began. My voice was no louder than a whisper. "I'm sorry for everything you went through. I'm sorry that you have to see Mom and me so upset. I'm sorry that I wasn't good enough to complete your mission. Next year, Daddy. Next year I will be. I'm sorry that you had to die and I'm sorry that you won't be with us anymore. I'm sorry for any pain you went through when you died. I'm sorry for forgetting your birthday sophomore year. I'm sorry that I can't ever see your face again. I'm sorry that Grandma and Grandpa Morgan can never know the truth. And most of all, Daddy, I'm sorry that this is the last goodbye. I love you so much, even if you are not here with me anymore. Goodbye, Daddy. Goodbye." I squeezed my eyes shut, trying to stop the heavy flow of tears, but it didn't work.

Looking at his casket, I thought about the times we would have together. I thought about the circus, dancing around in the kitchen, and I even thought about when he would get mad at me. I thought about everything, and that was enough to make me stop crying for a minute. I almost smiled, but I couldn't. My tears were only gone long enough to let me realize that they were gone. As soon as I realized that, they were back. I felt an arm on my shoulder and looked over at my mother. I then looked back at the rest of the room, but nobody was there.

"Where did everybody go?" I asked. It sounded so childish, but I didn't care.

"They left, kiddo. Abby took your roommates back to Gallagher," she said. "You were standing up here for forty-five minutes, and no one wanted to disturb you."

"Oh," I said. I hadn't realized it had been that long. I was getting caught off-guard a lot today.

"Are you ready to go?" she asked.

"Yeah," I said. And I was.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, I'm sure."

I knew that I would never be able to be this close to my father again. The small funeral that Mr. Solomon went to had already happened, and this was my last chance to be near my father. I was ready to leave though. I was ready to let my father have the peace he deserved, which is why my mother kept her arm around me as we walked out together. Before we left the room, though, I turned around once more. I had stopped crying and was ready to leave, but something made me turn around.

"What is it, kiddo?" Mom asked, but I just shook my head.

I smiled and realized that my dad would always be with me. He would always be with my mother. My father would always be with everyone he loved, even if this was the last goodbye.


End file.
